the power of words

Sometimes life comes at you fast.
Sometimes it’s a curveball to the face and knocks you down and out.
Other times, it IS a fastball, except in the slowest of slow motions – that you find your brain taking it’s sweet, sweet precious time to let it seem to sink in.

Is it trauma? Is it denial? Is it just plain, good ole fashioned shock? Or the fast paced life we live, that you need time for it to trickle down all the crevices of your brain, your heart, your soul?
The way the chocolate syrup slowly trickles down a gorgeous two-scoop vanilla ice cream cone on a nice summer day? But this time, it’s not a delicious addition to your life, but a breaking of your spirit.

These past few weeks, that was me… slowly, my conscious was covered with this gooey covering of “what in the actual world just happened?” And I was rendered almost speechless within myself. So, as I sit here and try to write and make sense of it all, I looked up an old phrase that kept running though my mind –

“There is Power in the Tongue / Words.”

Google brought up & reminded me of not just a few, but so, so many verses about “the Power of our Words,” and what I thought I was setting out to write, has taken an entirely different direction.

The Bible is chock-full of verses about the weight of the words from our mouth or even the lack thereof when we should be using them to lift someone up.

I admit, I am not innocent. None of us are.

“Death and life are in the power of the tongue” – Proverbs 18:21
“Whoever wants to love life and see good, keep your tongue from evil and your lips from speaking deceit.” – 1 Peter 3:10
“The words of the wise brings healing.” Proverbs 12:18
“Gentle words are a tree of life, but perverseness breaks the spirit.” Proverbs 15:4

Those are just a few of many.
I came here to speak about the way words powerfully shook me to my core.

Altered me, probably, forever.
Rendered me… speechless.

*I’ll pause for you that know me closely, to make your jokes here ;-)*

I’ll also let you know, that it is and was, no joke.
My stomach is still dropped to it’s core, I still have only been able to speak of this to two people, and am otherwise… quiet.

The lessons I walk away from this are, many.
Beyond the main one – The Power of Words (& the lack thereof.)

Lesson One. Boundaries.

Protect yourself, you are worthy of love & kindness.
Your kids are worthy of it too, so if you can’t do it for you, do it for them. Boundaries.

They come in all shapes & sizes for all kinds of situations and people.
Relatives & friends alike. Work, play. Embrace them. Use them. They are for the betterment of you and yours. One my friends straight up told me, “You will never have the relationship you want with this person, I am sorry, but you have to remember that.”
Protect yourself. Boundaries.

Lesson Two. Look Within.
There are power in MY words, too. And I want to bring laughter and life.

While I found myself feeling saddened, and a pit in my stomach, I also stepped outside of myself for a moment and saw myself with the chitter-chatter (both inside & outside of my head)… doing the exact same thing!
While I’m saying “Hey – YOU are being a jerk (aka throwing proverbial stones) when you xyz!” my other hand was essentially throwing an entire handful of stones at the exact same time. 😳😔

*tap, tap, tap to my own shoulder, “hey dummy, do you SEE you?”*
I 100% know THAT is not the woman I wanted to be, nor the example I want to set.

& Lesson Three. Lean.
In, lean on, & breathe…

“A bruised reed He will not break,
a smoldering wick he will not put out.” – Isaiah 42:3

We all have at least one or more trusted friends that can brighten or lighten the load. Plus other things we know to be tried and true to pull us out of the pit.

For me, I know getting outdoors and getting my miles in pumps up the endorphins/dopamine… & doing other little things that make the small world around me a sweeter place. (What are your pick-me-ups?)

It’s hard for me to reach out when I am dealing with something, and this incident was particularly harder.
But, know the faster I do reach out, the faster I feel better.
Be that someone for others, so when they are that for you, you feel ok accepting it back.

Thank you to my tiny trusted tribe who listened, let me cry, gave me wisdom, & then made me laugh. You are gold. I’m still a little quiet, but I know it’s ok.

And, just like with every other thing that has come before “this,” LIFE continues to get better, stronger, and more beautiful.

This time around, I hope I will continue to pause & remember

There is so much “Power in the tongue/ my words,” and I hope that I will use mine for loving and lifting others up, whether I know them or not.

This is my reminder, and hopefully yours!

Here is one more for the road… ♡ ~ j

“Let us not grow weary of doing good…” – Galations 6:9